RAZOR Wrestling Episode #10

The fancy (and expensive) new signature for RAZOR Wrestling on GRBG flashes across your screen and we find ourselves within Bobby Shitake Arena. The hoard of thirteen hundred fans scream and cheer in the stands, each more rabid and energized than the next. The crane camera shot falls onto the announce table and our broadcast team.

DICK DELAURIER: Welcome wrestling fans to Episode Ten of RAZOR Wrestling on GRBG. My name is Dick Delaurier and I am here alongside my broadcast partner, the always chaotic Fiona Metz. Metz, how are we feeling about Episode Ten.

FIONA METZ: If the rumors that I’ve heard are true then I feel…anger.

DICK DELAURIER: That’s pretty much par for the course with you, no?

FIONA METZ: I’m usually surly. Tonight I’m angry. Big difference, Dicky.

DICK DELAURIER: Do you care to enlighten me and the audience on why that is?

FIONA METZ: You’ll see.

DICK DELAURIER: I’m sure I will. Wrestling fans, we’d like to take you to the ring now with our interim General Manager, Sophie Whimm.

(Interim) General Manager Sophie Whimm stands in the center of the ring. Absent is her typical giant smile and in its place a neutral expression. Off to her left is a podium and sitting atop it is a shape hidden by a purple velvet bag. Wonder what that could be? Sophie is armed with a microphone and is ready to address the RAZOR Wrestling faithful.

SOPHIE WHIMM: Welcome fans to RAZOR Wrestling Episode Ten. As many of you are aware, RAZOR Wrestling President Molly Bones has been arrested in connection with the death of General Manager Hank Malone. Since the two of them flew off to Europe, I have been in charge of the company.

This fact is met with a mixed reaction from Las Vegas.

SOPHIE WHIMM: After reviewing the company charter it appears that in the absence of the President and also the General Manager…the Interim General Manager is to be legitimized as the top officer in the company. That would be…me.

Whimm smirks slightly but she is reserved. One wouldn’t be faulted for thinking that she still mourns for Hank Malone and/or is concerned for the wellbeing of Molly Bones.

SOPHIE WHIMM: That being said I have…decided…that because I’m but a little baby in this industry, I need some help in guiding RAZOR Wrestling through Season Two and beyond. A partnership has been assembled to assist me in this endeavor. Please join me in welcoming this consortium; Horado Basa, Enzo Dante, and Mauler Metz.

Generic rock music plays and at once a trio of men, each in their sixties, step out onto the stage. All three are dressed in fine suits and wouldn’t look out of place on a red carpet. Or in a police lineup. The trio are met with an uncertain hum from the crowd. They walk to the ring and one by one ascend the steel steps. Once they are in the ring, Mauler Metz approaches the announce position side of the ring and winks at the broadcast team.

DICK DELAURIER: You alright Fiona?

FIONA METZ: (through her teeth) Peachy.

Big Mouth Mindy fumbles with three microphones and brings them to the ring apron where Sophie Whimm collects them. She hands them out and then goes to speak but she is cut off by Enzo Dante.

ENZO DANTE: So this is it? RAZOR Wrestling. The Bobby Shitake Arena. Mucchio di spazzatura.

Dante chuckles to himself and the Italian speaking members of the audience aren’t pleased. He called it a trash heap, which is a rude thing to say – even in America.

HORADO BASA: I believe that the dilapidated state of this arena is part of its charm, Enzo. But RAZOR Wrestling needs to adapt to its sudden popularidad. This place is becoming the talk of the wrestling world. We three should know, we each own a wrestling promotion in our respective countries. I own Fábrica de Lucha de Guadalajara, Signore Dante owns Wrestle Italia in Rome, and Mauler Metz owns United Wrestling Kingdom in Manchester.

MAULER METZ: We all appreciate what Mol and the pirate band she ‘as assembled have done ‘ere. That’s why we’ve come to help. Ms. Whimm ‘as done a crackin’ job so far but with Mol being indisposed we figured that we would do ‘er the kindness of coming to ‘elp. To guide Ms. Whimm on the treacherous path that a wrestling boss walks.

ENZO DANTE: We are here because we are good natured servants of this wonderful industry. We have proposed some plans to Ms. Whimm and she has enthusiastically accepted these proposals.

Sophie appears to be anything but enthusiastic. The fans are perplexed but curious about what exactly The Consortium has in mind.

HORADO BASA: The next three RAZOR Wrestling events will not take place in the Bobby Shitake Arena. We, The Consortium, have invited Sophie Whimm and her company to hold three events in our respective home arenas. First we will go to Rome, Italy for an event at Arena Tutto Sport. Then on to Manchester, England for a show with UWK, and we will end the excursion in Guadalajara with my company FLG.

MAULER METZ: All the while this little dump will be gettin’ a face lift. Courtesy of The Consortium.

Mauler pops off some finger guns and the crowd is less than pleased to hear about renovations to their church.

ENZO DANTE: C'è dell'altro. RAZOR Wrestling will establish a new singles championship on this tour that we have been gracious enough to organize. The Vanguard Champion.

Mauler and Basa each take a side of the velvet shroud and lift it to unveil the new Vanguard Championship. There are “oohs”, even a few “ahhs”. These fans are so easy to impress.

ENZO DANTE: Next week in my home of Rome there will be a Colosseo Match featuring fifteen competitors. You call it a battle royal here. The difference between a battle royal and a Colosseo Match being that the last four standing will move on to the second round in the Vanguard Series, which will take place in Manchester. It will see wrestlers from both RAZOR Wrestling and Wrestle Italia compete. So it is very possible that someone from my roster will move on and claim this new championship...

Dante smirks like the evil prick that he is.

MAULER METZ: But we won’t be tellin’ ya what exactly waits for the four winners when they come to UWK. Not yet, anyway.

HORADO BASA: We will, however, tell you that at each co-promoted show we will give a member of the RAZOR Wrestling roster an opportunity to face the top champion of each company – with their title being on the line.

MAULER METZ: This all sounds pretty fuckin’ brilliant, doesn’t it Las Vegas?

There are some cheers. There are also various cases of sour grapes among the Las Vegas faithful, given that RAZOR will be on the road for nearly two months. Many fans are discussing whether Italy even likes pro wrestling…

ENZO DANTE: We will see you in Europe. Buona notte.

The three men leave the ring and it’s a mixed reaction from the crowd. Sophie has a “please don’t hate me” look on her face but it’s all for naught. They do hate you Sophie, what have you wrought?


The first match of the evening sees the new pairing of Peregrina Loca and Araña Oscura take on the makeshift team of Hijo de la Muerte and Zilpah Okelo! What fun. Oscura starts the match off against Muerte and it…does not go well for her. She eats a spinning wheel kick and before she can regain her faculties Muerte has her back on the mat with a leaping leg lariat Referee Danielle Pollock is there to make the count.

DICK DELAURIER: Not a great start for Araña Oscura.

FIONA METZ: She never has a great start. Or middle. Or end.

1..

2..!

A kick out at two! Surprising, considering the size difference between them. Hijo de la Muerta maintains wrist control and makes the tag to partner Zilpah Okelo. The Sweet Talker gets a big reaction from Las Vegas and she is pleased as punch about it. Okelo sends Araña Oscura into the ropes with an Irish whip and on the Destructora’s return she gets drilled into the mat with a Samoan drop.

DICK DELAURIER: Do you think that having Arana Oscura’s mentor Horado Basa in the building is taking away some of her attention from this contest, Metz?

FIONA METZ: Maybe. Because she’s weak. I’m here, I’m doing my fucking job. Even when my mind is on walking backstage and gutting that old bastard Mauler.

DICK DELAURIER: Tell us how you really feel…

FIONA METZ: I just did, you bitch.

DICK DELAURIER: Figure of speech.

Peregrina Loca patiently awaits the opportunity to get into this contest but that isn’t coming any time soon as her partner Araña Oscura has taken refuge on the ring apron. That doesn’t bother Zilpah Okelo one bit as starches Oscura with a big body blow. Okelo drags Oscura through the ropes by the head and spikes her into the mat with Out To Dry (Rope Hung DDT). Okelo covers and Loca is starting to look nervous.

1..

2..!

Kick out! The Baby Destructora is still fighting and Las Vegas seems to respect it. There are small pockets in the crowd that actually start cheering for her. Araña Oscura tries to crawl to her corner to make the tag but Zilpah Okelo is still fresh as a daisy. Okelo takes hold of Oscura’s left leg, yanks her backwards, and catches her in a sleeper hold! Oscura reaches out for Peregrina Loca but she is trapped in the idle of the ring.

FIONA METZ: Zilpah Okelo is underrated as hell and I think if she let her full nastiness show we could have another PJ Lemon on our hands.

DICK DELAURIER: I certainly hope not.

FIONA METZ: Watch your mouth, Dick! Don’t speak ill of the dead.

DICK DELAURIER: She is very much alive.

The Sweet Talker is tactical, she slowly steps backward to her corner and this allows Hijo de la Muerte to make the blind tag. Zilpah Okelo releases the sleeper and sends Araña Oscura into the ropes with an Irish whip. Muerte takes off from his corner and DESTROYS Oscura with a Busaiku Knee Strike! Oscura lands hard on the back of her neck and Muerte instantly comes crashing down on her with a springboard moonsault. Muerte hooks the leg and Danielle Pollock flops onto the canvas to make the count.

FIONA METZ: For a makeshift team Muerte and Okelo are working together like cheese and chocolate.

DICK DELAURIER: I think they are working quite well together as a team.

FIONA METZ: That’s what I said!

1..

2..

..!

KICK OUT!

FIONA METZ: HOW?

Las Vegas can’t believe the resilience of Araña Oscura! Hijo de la Muerte pounds the mat in frustration and tags Zilpah Okelo back into the contest. Okelo instructs her partner and he gives her a nod before treating Oscura to a toe kick to the midsection. The duo apply a double front face lock and hoist Oscura into the air for a double brainbuster but Oscura slips out and lands behind them! Okelo and Muerte turn around to see Oscura sailing through the air! Oscura takes both of her opponents down with a springboard crossbody and Las Vegas whoops it up!

DICK DELAURIER: Arana Oscura is showing signs of life! What a takedown!

FIONA METZ: She’s showing off for Daddy.

DICK DELAURIER: Horado Basa is not her father.

FIONA METZ: I’m talking about Pera.

Peregrina Loca is stretching her arm out as far as it will go. Araña Oscura is crawling towards her and after some time for the drama to build, Oscura slaps her partner’s hand! TAG! Loca vaults over the top rope and immediately meets Hijo de la Muerte with an enziguiri that sends him bumbling over the top rope to the floor. Okelo is back to her feet but she doesn’t know a tag was made! Loca leaps into the air and sends Okelo face first into the canvas with a leapfrog bulldog!

DICK DELAURIER: Incredible athleticism from the veteran!

FIONA METZ: For an old broad she can really go.

DICK DELAURIER: I don’t think she would appreciate you calling her that.

FIONA METZ: Take a hard look at me not giving one single shit.

Las Vegas cheers Mamá no Más on as she stands, measuring Zilpah Okelo. Okelo is trying to recover, draped over the second rope facing the crowd. Peregrina Loca calls out to Bobby Shitake Arena, takes off for the ropes and comes back with a Tiger Feint Kick that smashes Okelo in the face. Without a second's hesitation Pera darts across the ring and hits a tope suicida on Hijo de la Muerte on the outside!

DICK DELAURIER: Peregrina Loca is on fire!

FIONA METZ: Probably just hot flashes.

DICK DELAURIER: Will you stop?

Zilpah Okelo is on dream street as Peregrina Loca slithers back into the ring. Within seconds Pera snatches Okelo up and delivers the Pera Driver (Wrist-Clutch Exploder Suplex)! She could win it right here but Pera tags in Araña Oscura and then points her thumb to the ceiling. Oscura nods, climbs to the top rope, and then comes crashing down on Okelo with a Phoenix Splash! Oscura hooks Okelo’s leg and Danielle Pollock makes the count.

1..

2..

..3!

BIG MOUTH MINDY: Here are your winners, the team of Peregrina Loca and Araña Oscura!

It's a whole new experience for Araña Oscura, as she stands with one arm held aloft by the official, and the other by Peregrina Loca. The crowd, barely half-cut and yet to be warmed up before the pair took to the ring, are cheering. For her. A rippling flood of emotions wash over her face - shock and alarm, delirious joy, and then a choking laugh of disbelief that brings moisture to her young eyes.

"DE-STRUCT-O-RAS!" clap-clap-clapclapclap "DE-STRUCT-O-RAS!"

Pera doesn't look all that thrilled by the chant, pulling a bit of a face before rallying herself with a shit-eating grin and yanking on the rookie's arm, turning her toward the other half of the arena. There's a resurgent pop that actually weakens Araña's legs, forcing the official to support her for a moment before she waves him off. Meanwhile, her partner is signaling for a microphone.

PEREGRINA LOCA: You are too kind, Bobby Shitake Arena!

"WE ARE TOO KIND!" clap-clap-clapclapclap "WE ARE TOO KIND!"

Both women laugh, and Pera turns her grin on Araña, pulling her into a quick, firm hug - and, when they part ways, dexterously leaving the microphone behind in the rookie's hand.

ARAÑA OSCURA: I-- I don't know what to say. ...Gracias?

"YOU DESERVE IT!" clap-clap-clapclapclap "YOU DESERVE IT!"

ARAÑA OSCURA: I-- um...

That seems to be all she's got. The canny vet interposes, gently tugging the mic away and taking a stroll around the ring, letting the crowd get it out of their system, nodding and smiling along with their rhythm. Oscura looks like she wants to be anywhere else, and nowhere else, all at once. She's even blushing. Pera cuts in when the crowd begins to calm, smoothly taking control.

PEREGRINA LOCA: You know, at first I wanted to correct you; we are not the Destructoras. We are something new.

The crowd start to chime in again, but Pera holds up a finger to hush them.

PEREGRINA LOCA: BUT! But. Then I realized - perhaps we are them. Perhaps the spirit of Destructoras, all along, was Araña Oscura.

"SÍ! SÍ! SÍ! SÍ!"

Araña looks like she's about to burst. Playfully, Pera punches her in the arm.

PEREGRINA LOCA: You know, I think they like that? Do you know what they'd like even better?

That gets a bemused shake of the head. Of course she doesn't know. Pera knows.

PEREGRINA LOCA: We're not just Destructoras. We are SUPER DESTRUCTORAAAAAS!

She pulls the mic away from her lips as she roars, leaning backwards and ending with the mic up in the air, dramatically unfurling her fingers to send it dropping to the canvas - as the crowd dig deep for the biggest pop of the night thus far. Araña Oscura goes from flushed to absolutely pale, turning to stare at Peregrina with her mouth open, wearing a mask of complete shock.

FIONA METZ: Wow, that's really fucking stupid.

DICK DELAURIER: The fans don't seem to think so!

FIONA METZ: Yeah, well, they're-- you know. Guess who else I bet frigging hates it?

CALAVERA: ¡CHINGADA MADRE!

We've cut abruptly to the erstwhile Destructoras' locker room, where that almighty bellow from Oscura's injured (former?) teammate heralds an alarming metallic crunch as she drives her fist into the locker beside her. Craneo is seated nearby, staring with utter contempt at the small, CRT television screen showing what's occurring in the ring.

CALAVERA: We're settling this, right now. She can't just-- RRGHHH!!

Growling, the large woman attempts to stand - only for Craneo to reach out, and seize her injured leg cruelly between long-nailed fingers, twisting sharply. The powerhouse luchadora whimpers and sits back down, fury dissipating with the injured pride of a hound brought to heel as she whips her stare to the other woman, who gazes coldly back. Serpentine, and matter-of-fact as she speaks.

CRANEO: She can. She did. What exactly do you think you're going to do about it?

CALAVERA: What are you going to do about it?

They both know it's a lame comeback. They both know it's a valid question. Craneo doesn't even bother rolling her eyes; she palms her phone, and starts to get up.

CRANEO: I'm going to make a phone call.

CALAVERA: This wouldn't have happened if not for that dead cabrón...

Craneo arches a brow and folds her arms, leaning casually against the dented locker.

CRANEO: You're right. Instead, you'd have gone out there and lost - again, and our sister wouldn't be having the best time of her life right now.

CALAVERA: So you're on her side? The outsider? The traitor? The one fucking over our family?

CRANEO: I'm on our family's side, minusválido.

Calavera bristles at the hissed insult, but merely sets her jaw and doesn't interrupt.

CRANEO: And I'm going to fix this, like I fix everything. Now, be a good girl. Sit. Stay.

With a thud, Calavera throws her head back against the wall, as Craneo slinks from the room, pulling up a number on her phone. She's beginning to converse rapidly in Spanish as we cut away.



The camera struggles to focus and spends far too long looking at a patch of black mold that seems to be creeping up a brick wall in real time. So we’re backstage. The camera whip pans over to show “The Prodigy” Kash Warren walking towards gorilla position with the stunning Angela DiAmante by his side.

KASH WARREN: Perfect, a camera. I’ve got something to say before I go out to that ring and flatten that delusional man child Ace Sky. I saw what The Consortium had to say and I want in. I want that Vanguard Championship and I don’t care how many of these lowlifes I have to go through to get it.

They continue down the hall, with the cameraman struggling to keep up. DiAmante notices the black mold and gags.

KASH WARREN: I’ve traveled the world, beaten legends on every continent, and I’m prepared to do it all again to become the first Vanguard Champion. Rome, The Colosseo Match, The Prodigy. Those three things are going to come together and forge my first (of many) shining moments in this company. Here comes the preview and after that, we’re off to Italy.

DiAmante and Warren disappear through the curtain that leads to gorilla.

The second contest of the night sees fan favourite “The Space Shaman” Ace Sky take on “The Prodigy” Kash Warren, with Angela DiAmante by his side. Sean McCauley is the referee for this contest and he calls for the opening bell. Warren walks to the center of the ring and gestures to Sky to meet him in a classic collar and elbow tie up. Sky obliges. Warren attempts a headlock takeover but the veteran Sky slips loose of Warren’s grip and treats him to a high dropkick to the back of the head!

DICK DELAURIER: Some feistiness out of Ace Sky tonight!

FIONA METZ: Probably tired of losing all the time.

DICK DELAURIER: I don’t think it bothers him all that much. He is very zen.

FIONA METZ: It should bother him. He bothers me!

DICK DELAURIER: Who doesn’t?

FIONA METZ: Only one person and she’s DEAD!

Kash Warren has stumbled forward, catching himself on the ropes. He turns to see that Ace Sky is seated cross legged on the mat, his eyes closed, meditating. Warren can’t believe the disrespect! Neither can I! Warren charges toward his opponent but just before the moment of impact Sky opens his eyes, pops up to a knee, and puts Warren on the canvas with a Fireman’s Carry takedown!

DICK DELAURIER: I do not think that Kash Warren was expecting this kind of fight out of Ace Sky here tonight in Las Vegas.

FIONA METZ: I wonder if the Space Shaman has been playing possum the whole time? He has convinced us all that he sucks so that he could not suck at the right time.

DICK DELAURIER: Maybe not the best career path.

FIONA METZ: He looks like he sells crystals down at the art market. I don’t think he’s playing with a full deck.

DICK DELAURIER: He isn’t playing at all tonight. Ace Sky came to win, it seems!

Ace Sky uses his speed to quickly transition into a Fujiwara armbar! Angela DiAmante lets out a squeak, fearing the worst! Sky nearly has the hold completely locked in but Kash Warren grabs the middle rope and Sean McCauley makes Sky break the hold. Of course Sky breaks it immediately. Sportsmanship and all that. Warren gets to his feet but Sky NAILS him with a flying spinning heel kick that sends Warren over the top rope to the floor, where he lands at the feet of DiAmante.

DICK DELAURIER: Kash Warren needs to regroup. So far Ace Sky has had his number.

FIONA METZ: Seven?

DICK DELAURIER: Again…figure of speech.

FIONA METZ: Ohhhh…eight.

The Space Shaman calls out to Las Vegas and then points at Kash Warren on the floor. Warren is slow to get to his feet and doesn’t see Sky take off to the opposite side of the ring. Sky rebounds off the ropes and sprints across the ring! Sky leaps into the air and looks for a tope con hiro to the outside! Both Warren and Angela DiAmante dive out of the way and Sky crashes and burns! THUD!

DICK DELAURIER: Oh my! That could be a few broken ribs for Ace Sky!

FIONA METZ: I once knew a guy who got his floating rib removed so that he could–

DICK DELAURIER: No you didn’t.

FIONA METZ: (defeated) No. No I didn’t.

Knowing that this is his opportunity to turn things around, Kash Warren pounces on Ace Sky. Sky can’t even fight back, he really got the wind knocked out of him. Warren hefts Sky up and then sends him head first into the steel steps! The steps dislodge and Sky is down once again. Warren wastes no time in getting Sky up and back into the ring. Warren joins his opponent and shockingly, Sky is back up to his feet. Warren meets him with a discus forearm that folds Sky up on the canvas. Warren applies a high stack and Sean McCauley makes the count.

1..

2..!

Kick out at two! Still in “go mode”, Kash Warren seamlessly transitions from his failed pin into a single leg crab! The dazed Ace Sky is reaching out for the ropes but he is nowhere near them. Las Vegas cheers Sky on and he finds the strength to push his torso off of the mat to walk on his hands. Warren does his best to hold Sky in place but ultimately Sky reaches the bottom rope. Sean McCauley tells Warren to break the hold but Warren screams “I have until five!” McCauley shrugs and starts the five count. Warren breaks the hold at four.

DICK DELAURIER: Kash Warren using the full extent of that five count.

FIONA METZ: As one should! That’s what it's there for!

DICK DELAURIER: Sportsmanship would dictate otherwise.

FIONA METZ: Sportsmanship doesn’t exist in this shit hole. You know that!

The Space Shaman is trying to get up to his feet but Kash Warren rushes him and kicks him hard in the back of the head. Ace Sky is in a daze when Warren stands him up and applies a gutwrench. Warren lifts Sky up but Sky kicks his feet and quickly counters it into the Cranium Crater Crunch (Belly To Back Cradle Piledriver) out of nowhere! Sky covers! Sean McCauley counts! Las Vegas counts along with him!

DICK DELAURIER: What a counter from Ace Sky!

1..

2..

..!

KICKOUT!

DICK DELAURIER: Ace Sky nearly put away Kash Warren!

Angela DiAmante breathes a sigh of relief at ringside. The shot switches to show Ace Sky sitting up, smiling. He’s too laid back to let a simple kick out bother him. Sky rolls backward and then kips up. He points down at Kash Warren and then hits an impressive standing, twisting mariposa! All of the air is driven out of Warren’s body and he is vulnerable once more. Sky stands Warren up, takes him to a corner and seats him on the top rope.

FIONA METZ: Here we go. The Space Shaman is looking to blast off!

DICK DELAURIER: Yikes.

FIONA METZ: This is the support I get for trying to be positive? A yikes? Fuck you, bitch.

Ace Sky joins Kash Warren on the top rope and after a brief battle, Sky cracks Warren with a hard shot to subdue him. Sky calls out to Las Vegas and then attempts the Helium Hop (Super Frankensteiner)! NO! At the last second Warren dives forward and hits a super powerbomb! Both men crash into the canvas and the crowd is in awe! Warren finds the wherewithal to crawl over and make a cover. Sean McCauley counts.

DICK DELAURIER: This has to be it!

FIONA METZ: The Space Shaman had a Challenger moment!

DICK DELAURIER: Jeeeesus Christ.

1..

2..

..

KICKOUT AT THE VERY LAST SECOND!

FIONA METZ: From the ashes! Unlike the Challenger crew.

DICK DELAURIER: You’ve gotta stop.

Angel DiAmante screams from ringside. She can’t believe it! Kash Warren mounts Ace Sky and lays into him with the ground and pound. Sky is doing his best to cover up but nearly every blow is landing. Once Sky is sufficiently worn down, Warren stands him up. The Prodigy sets Sky up for Kash Flow (Feast Your Eyes) but as he tosses him up Sky drops down and rolls Warren up!

1..

2..

..!

Warren reverses the roll-up into a pinning combination of his own! He holds the ropes for leverage and referee Sean McCauley doesn’t see it!

1..

2..

..3!

BIG MOUTH MINDY: Here is your winner, “The Prodigy” Kash Warren!

"DOA" by I Prevail [feat. Joyner Lucas] starts playing. Las Vegas is not impressed with Kash Warren’s lack of sportsmanship but Angela DiAmante is! She joins her man at the bottom of ramp following his exit from the ring. Ace Sky sits up and is actually laughing. Sky looks up at Sean McCauley.

ACE SKY: You didn’t see that, huh? That’s okay, friend. Everyone makes mistakes. Peace be with you.

McCauley is baffled. Sky gets to his feet and asks for the microphone from Big Mouth Mindy. Kash Warren and Angela DiAmante are still celebrating on the ramp.

ACE SKY: You know, I wasn’t sure if you were really a cheater, Kash. But you just showed me that you are. That’s alright, I should have seen it coming. I gave you the benefit of the doubt and it cost me this match. Live and learn. Congratulations on the win.

Warren is laughing now. He got one over on Sky and is now headed to Rome for the Colosseo Match.

ACE SKY: Truth is, Kash, I’m not a big fan of battle royals. They really are my worst type of match. My Kryptonite, if you will. But in spite of that I am going to enter the Colosseo Match just to make sure that you can’t do what you did here tonight to anyone else. Maybe I’ll even squeak through and get one step closer to becoming the first Vanguard Champion. Best of luck, Kash. I’ll see you in Rome.

Sky winks at the camera and politely hands the microphone back to Big Mouth Mindy. That might be the first time that anyone has done that. Warren isn’t phased by Sky’s declaration. The last shot is of Warren and DiAmante celebrating before we go to a commercial break.



We return from our commercial break and the competitors for our next contest are already in the ring. This is a rematch from Superunknown as “The Martyr” Joey Bryant takes on the first ever GRBG Champion, Murder Ninja. Bryant attempts a handshake but Ninja kicks it away. An “ooooooh” from the crowd. Bryant smirks in response. Gina Stripes is your referee.

DICK DELAURIER: We saw these two go head to head on the Superunknown Kickoff Show and Murder Ninja lost to Joey Bryant in an upset.

FIONA METZ: I’m upset that I have to watch this again.

DICK DELAURIER: Their contest at Superunknown was quite good!

FIONA METZ: Yeah it was. Should have been on the main card!

DICK DELAURIER: You are a riddle of a person.

FIONA METZ: (moans)

Murder Ninja comes out hot as soon as the bell sounds. Joey Bryant is able to sidestep the former GRBG Champion, sending him into the ropes. On Ninja’s return Bryant is coming at him like a freight train! Bryant leaves his feet to crack Ninja in the jaw with a knee strike that drops Murder Ninja like a cellphone call in the 80s. Ninja scrambles back to his feet and Bryant takes him over with a German suplex! Bryant covers, Stripes is there to make the count.

DICK DELAURIER: A quick win for Joey Bryant?

1..

2–KICKOUT!

FIONA METZ: Stay of execution!

The first ever GRBG Champion ain’t going out like that! Murder Ninja is back up to a vertical base but Joey Bryant, with a smile to the hard camera, explodes with a superkick that propels Ninja back into the corner HARD! Bryant is immediately on Ninja, turning him upside down into a tree of woe! Bryant starts clapping and the fans in Vegas follow along. Bryant takes a few paces to the other side of the ring and then charges in with a dropkick to Ninja’s face!

DICK DELAURIER: Murder Ninja is not looking good in this contest.

FIONA METZ: Ever since he was buried alive he’s been having a tough go.

DICK DELAURIER: Understandable, I suppose.

Murder Ninja falls out of the corner into a heap. Joey Bryant plays to the crowd and they are firmly behind him. Ninja is on all fours, crawling to the middle of the ring. He gets up to one knee but Bryant grabs Ninja’s head and stuffs it between his legs! Bryant calls out to the fans again, lifts Ninja up, and releases him! Jackknife Powerbomb!

FIONA METZ: (Truck noises)

The Martyr isn’t finished with Murder Ninja yet, he came to Bobby Shitake Arena to make a statement. Joey Bryant stands Ninja up and then shoots him into the ropes with an Irish whip. Bryant rushes Ninja and just as Ninja comes off the ropes Bryant turns his lights out with a BIG BOOT! Ninja’s head nearly came off. Bryant hauls Ninja back up and plants him with VBurg (Hammerlock DDT)! Ninja is out and Bryant calls over to Gina Stripes.

JOEY BRYANT: Your time to shine!

Gina Stripes is perplexed but quickly understands as Joey Bryant covers Murder Ninja and hooks the leg. Stripes starts her count and Bryant slaps the mat with her in sync.

1..

2..

..KICKOUT!

The former GRBG Champion says no! He says, “I will not die!” (He didn’t actually say that but it’s more like his actions said that. Understand?) Joey Bryant is a little shocked but he also looks somewhat pleased. Bryant allows Murder Ninja the space to stand and when he does get to his feet Bryant grabs him in a front face lock, hoists him up and drills him into the canvas with Martyrdom (Spinning Brainbuster)! Gina Stripes is already in position, a development that pops Bryant. He covers.

1..

2..

..3!

BIG MOUTH MINDY: Here is your winner, “The Martyr” Joey Bryant!

"Cut - somenaan Remix" by Sweet Pill/somenaan cues up! Las Vegas cheers wildly as Gina Stripes raises Joey Bryant’s hand. Bryant whistles at Big Mouth Mindy and gestures that he wants the microphone. Without hesitation she tosses it to him. The music dies down as Bryant goes to speak.

JOEY BRYANT: Las Vegas! Thank you for the warm reception! Murder Ninja, thank you for the match!

Bryant bends over and shakes Murder Ninja’s limp hand. He’s out.

JOEY BRYANT: Oh we might need some help for this guy. I actually need some help too. I need someone to point me in the direction of wherever The Consortium are hanging out because I heard about this Vanguard Series and I’d like to take a stab at it. What do you think, Las Vegas? Do you think The Martyr can become the first Vanguard Champion?

Big pop, much to Bryant’s delight.

JOEY BRYANT: I think so too. Sophie, Basa, Enzo, Mauler – whichever one of you is booking this party, send an invitation my way. It’s what the people want!

Another pop! Bryant poses for the fans. Seems like RAZOR Wrestling has itself a new fan favourite. Which is great because we were kind of lacking and were going to have to ask one of the baddies to chill out with the heinous shit so we could balance the scales just a little. No need now!



An unhoused person lays on one of the shitty picnic tables outside Bobby Shitake Arena. He is fast asleep, despite the hot desert sun beaming down on him. All is well until a large shadow looms over him. The shot pulls back to reveal Ax Rockwell, who made his return to RAZOR Wrestling at Superunknown.

AX ROCKWELL: Hey! Rummy! Get the fuck out of here.

The drifter is startled awake, ready to throw hands with whomever disturbed his slumber. Like some kind of eldritch vagabond he bellows out a roar…until he sees the imposing physical force that is Rockwell. The drifter turtles and scampers away. Rockwell takes a seat, a disgusted look on his face. A soft voice calls out from off camera. The shot whip pans to show “Dreamweaver” Hope Freya.

HOPE FREYA: He was only trying to get some rest, Ax. There was little need to disturb him. We could have sat in the grass.

Rockwell looks down at the brown, dead, unmaintained patch of “grass”.

AX ROCKWELL: You could have. What did you want to meet about?

HOPE FREYA: I did not beckon you here. You called for me.

??: I called both of you pussies.

We turn to see Zilpah Okelo approaching with Masaru Shinja and Oh Tadao flanking her. The trio arrive at the picnic table. A confused scene to say the least.

HOPE FREYA: Zilpah. What is this concerning?

ZILPAH OKELO: Me. I’m fuckin’ concerned. While you two have been off doing whatever the fuck you been doing, Shinja and me been getting the shit kicked out of us by whoever was feelin’ froggy that week.

MASARU SHINJA: It is true. I am in great pain.

AX ROCKWELL: Try giving a shit. Then maybe you wouldn’t have the worst record in the company.

ZILPAH OKELO: This ain’t about gettin’ better. It’s about all of these pieces of shit coming in and tryna run us out of the company that we fuckin’ built. Sure, you two helped PJ Lemon hit the bricks but she ain’t the only piece of shit around here. Los Rebeldes are still here. Adam García is still here. That fuckin’ Godzilla lookin’ dude is here and now he’s got Hubie Halloween from Hell rollin’ wid em. We’re four of the Original 8 and it’s like we don’t even matter no more.

MASARU SHINJA: I would like to matter again.

AX ROCKWELL: Like I said, maybe if you–

HOPE FREYA: Please, Ax. Zilpah, I hear what you are saying. I have similar concerns, however, we can not fear change. We must embrace it and use it to find a path that serves us best.

ZILPAH OKELO: Listen Space Cadet – we (clap) are (clap) a (clap) fuckin’ (clap) endangered (clap) species.

Shinja flinches with each clap.

ZILPAH OKELO: Some shit is gonna go down tonight. Horado Basa, Mauler Metz, Enzo Dante – all three of them are here. And my sources tell me that they are tryna take the fuck over. Anyone who was here in the beginning is on borrowed time. They already took care of your step mama–

Okelo points at Rockwell. He doesn’t seem to care.

ZILPAH OKELO: -and we’re next. Gaudin ain’t gonna help us, but he should because he’s on the chopping block too. The only person from the Original 8 that’s safe is Craneo because of her ties to Basa. Spooky ass bitch.

OH TADAO: I believe that Ms. Okelo is right. You are all in grave danger. You need to stick together or the outcome could be quite tragic.

Hope Freya takes a moment to consider what Okelo is saying.

HOPE FREYA: I understand. For this evening, let us watch over one another. If anything goes awry then we are all bound to help one another. We need to learn more about the plots and schemes that are forming. Is that acceptable?

ZILPAH OKELO: Fuckin’...I guess. I’m not tryna have my career end. If that means that I gotta rely on you three…guess that’s what I gotta do. But I’m not waiting around for it to happen. We gotta get in front of this shit.

HOPE FREYA: I agree. Ax, are you with us?

AX ROCKWELL: Fuck else do I have going on?

The scene fades as the four (and Oh Tadao) make their arrangements for the evening. Kind of feels like a comic book team up but real and not nearly as cartoony.

Our next contest is a GRUDGE MATCH. Hope Freya and Ax Rockwell both made their long awaited returns to RAZOR Wrestling at Superunknown. They intervened in the attempted interference in the main event by the Tag Team Champions, Los Rebeldes del Bien. The two teams make their respective entrances.

DICK DELAURIER: Would you look at this, we have guests!

FIONA METZ: The 4 Of 8 are paranoid. I’m not stoked about The Consortium either but no one is out to get them. So why are these two out here?

DICK DELAURIER: 4O8, eh?

FIONA METZ: Copyright! That’s my intellectual property!

Zilpah Okelo and Masaru Shinja are at the top of the ramp. They are standing sentry, watching the match. It seems that they weren’t kidding about forming an alliance with Hope Freya and Ax Rockwell.

DICK DELAURIER: Hold on a second…

In the ring referee Zach Ebra is about to call for the opening bell when the RazorTron lights up with the image of all three members of The Consortium.

HORADO BASA: This is very disturbing. Ms. Freya, Mr. Rockwell, Mr. Shinja, Ms. Okelo – we are not here to harm you.

ENZO DANTE: We are here to make RAZOR Wrestling better.

MAULER METZ: We’re gonna prove that to yas. This match was original-ly (laughs) scheduled to be a non-title match. But to show yas that we have no ill will, we’re gonna make it for the straps. ‘Ow’s that for a peace offerin’?

Los Rebeldes don’t seem at all bothered. Zach Ebra holds up the Tag Team Titles, hands them off to Big Mouth Mindy and calls for the opening bell. Hope Freya starts the contest off against Pedro Gonzales. It’s a cruiserweight affair as both of them jockey for position with some fast paced back and forth.

DICK DELAURIER: The entire scope of this contest has changed! The titles are on the line!

FIONA METZ: I really hope this blows up in Mauler’s face. I may even get involved to try and make that happen.

DICK DELAURIER: You absolutely will not.

FIONA METZ: You aren’t my dad!

DICK DELAURIER: You don’t listen to your dad!

FIONA METZ: So why would I listen to you?

Hope Freya and Pedro Gonzales trade arm drags a few times but Gonzales dazes the perpetually dizzy Freya with a strong right hand. Gonzales applies an arm wrench but Freya plants her free hand and does a front flip in what looks like slow motion. Freya lands on her feet, glides behind Gonzales and rolls him up!

1..

2..

KICKOUT!

Pedro Gonzales scampers back to his corner, shocked that he almost lost the Tag Team Titles. He reaches up and tags in the imposing Persona Non Grata. PNG steps over the top rope and enters the ring. Hope Freya remains on one knee and she smiles. But her attention is diverted when Ax Rockwell calls to her. The big man wants a piece of PNG. Freya obliges, tagging in The Unfortunate Son.

FIONA METZ: It’s HOSS time!

DICK DELAURIER: How long have you had that in your back pocket?

FIONA METZ: FORever.

The two bulls collide in the middle of the ring and they start throwing bombs at one another. Persona Non Grata tries for a heavy lariat but Ax Rockwell blocks it with his forearms. Rockwell tries to throw a lariat of his own but PNG blocks that! PNG hits Rockwell with a headbutt to the nose and then backs into the ropes. Rockwell catches himself on the opposing ropes and tries to shake off the daze.

DICK DELAURIER: Uh oh. We may see a repeat of what happened at Superunknown?

FIONA METZ: No cage. No explosions. Another shitty sequel.

Persona Non Grata stomps across the ring, charging at Ax Rockwell! PNG looks like he is going to hit a spear like he did at Superunknown but at the last second Rockwell sidesteps him and sends PNG through the ropes to the outside! The big man of Los Rebeldes lands in a heap – Las Vegas erupts in applause!

FIONA METZ: I guess the big dumb bitch learned his lesson.

Ax Rockwell goes to exit the ring but Pedro Gonzales cheap shots him from behind! Mestizo is running around Persona Non Grata in circles in some strange attempt at rousing him. Rockwell turns around to face Gonzales but Hope Freya flies through the air and catches Gonzales with a springboard hurricanranna. With Gonzales handled, Rockwell exits the ring to go after PNG.

DICK DELAURIER: Not today Pedro!

FIONA METZ: That’s my line when they ask if I’m going to pay my bill at Tacos Impios.

DICK DELAURIER: You’re awful.

FIONA METZ: Should be free! They are a sponsor!

On the outside Ax Rockwell lines Persona Non Grata up. Mestizo is signing, hopping up and down, trying to warn PNG. As soon as PNG is fully standing, Rockwell charges toward him looking for some payback with a spear of his own! PNG sidesteps him and uses Rockwell’s own momentum to send him crashing through the barricade!

DICK DELAURIER: Christ on a cracker!

The chaos at ringside gets overshadowed as two figures appear on the entrance ramp behind the less-than-vigilant Zilpah Okelo and Masaru Shinja. The unidentified figures each attack Okelo and Shinja from behind. Okelo is sent face first into the RazorTron while Shinja is sent flying off of the stage into a bunch of sound equipment! Sparks and all that shit burst into the air! The two men then haul Okelo up and hit her with a spike piledriver onto the steel stage!

DICK DELAURIER: What the fuck? That’s Wrestle Italia Campionato Mondiale Furio Arcuri and UWK Champion Tom Canterbury! This was all a goddamn set up!

FIONA METZ: Zilpah Okelo was right. Huh. Wild.

DICK DELAURIER: That’s all you have to say?

FIONA METZ: I mean I didn’t expect two champions from Europe to show up here tonight, no. I don’t really know what to say. My dad and his buddies are dicks but even I didn’t expect this. At least, not yet.

Hope Freya is already halfway up the ramp to get after Tom Canterbury and Furio Arcuri but the European assassins have slipped through the curtain. In the ring, Persona Non Grata has slipped Ax Rockwell in under the bottom rope. In short order Los Rebeldes hit Rockwell with Mala Onda (Pop-up bridging German Suplex [Pedro] & Discus Lariat [PNG])! Freya sprints back down the ramp to help Rockwell but Gonzales flies through the ropes with a tope suicida, taking Dreamweaver down and thwarting the rescue. PNG covers Rockwell.

1..

2..

..3!

BIG MOUTH MINDY: Here are your winners, and STILL RAZOR Wrestling Tag Team Champions, the team of Pedro Gonzales & Persona Non Grata, Los Rrrrrebeldes del Bien!

Pedro Gonzales gingerly enters the ring and is handed his Tag Team title by Zach Ebra. Persona Non Grata had already snatched his up. Mestizo enters the ring to join the boys and they celebrate. Well, Gonzales celebrates, the other two just kind of stand there as we head to a commercial break.



It’s quite the scene in the dank, dark hallways of Bobby Shitake Arena. Hope Freya and Ax Rockwell are both worse for wear but they are assisting medical staff in guiding the dual stretchers of Zilpah Okelo and Masaru Shinju toward the awaiting ambulances.

The collective pass by Liam Richardson and Miles Watson, Strike 2 Kill, who are standing in front of the interview set where a fifteen year old flatscreen with a crack down the middle plays the RAZOR Wrestling on GRBG signature on a loop. The tag team is quickly joined by RAZOR Backstage Correspondent Champ Marlborough.

CHAMP MARLBOROUGH: Wild stuff happenin’ here in Vegas t’night.

MILES WATSON: You can say that again.

LIAM RICHARDSON: The more time we spend here, the more I realize that no one is ever safe in this arena.

CHAMP MARLBOROUGH: Sure as shootin’. Speakin’ of shootin’, you boys care to comment on yer run as of late? Ain’t been doin’ too hot. Lots of people figured you was gonna win the Riggs & Murtaugh Tag Team Tournament. That didn’t happen. Then you lost a Kickoff Show Match to Insane Fortune at Superunknown. What’s goin’ on with you boys?

LIAM RICHARDSON: Yeah it’s been a rough few months for us. But we’ve reconnected with Mark Storm and we feel good about the future. We feel that we’re about to ascend to the level that we know we deserve to be at–

Richardson is cut off when he is attacked from behind. Clobbered, would be the right word. Shinobu Tsutsumi’s Kaijus, SHADOJIMA and Samhain have appeared out of nowhere! I guess Tsutsumi saw Strike 2 Kill and decided that they were a target.

CHAMP MARLBOROUGH: That’s my cue to exit!

Marlborough darts out of frame as SHADOJIMA lifts Miles Watson up and drops him back first onto a road case! Samhain has hold of Liam Richardson. The two monsters lift Richardson up and powerbomb him onto Watson, on the road case! Shinobu Tsutsumi appears, smirking.

SHINOBU TSUTSUMI: That’s enough…for now.

The trio walk out of frame, leaving Strike 2 Kill in a heap. It’s true, no one is ever safe if this arena.

There is a commotion in the crowd as Los Rebeldes del Bien return to ringside, walking through the hoard of fans. During the commercial break they went to the concession stand to retrieve snacks for Mestizo as it is their intention to watch the Number One Contenders Match. The trio make three fans (one a small child) vacate three seats in the front row.

DICK DELAURIER: Hey, those are paying fans!

FIONA METZ: And they are getting a cool experience! Jealous!

The father of the small child tries to take the kid’s booster seat with him. Persona Non Grata grabs the father’s wrist. The dad begs off and flees with his family. Pedro Gonzales lifts Mestizo up and sits him on the elevated seat. The Tag Team Champions sit down on either side of him, championships slung over their respective shoulders.

All three teams are in the ring as referee Vivian Rosser lays down the law to all six wrestlers. They are all half listening. We can hear her clearly state that only two people can be in the ring at one time and that anyone can tag anyone. Glad we sorted it out. Despite what the match graphic says, this match will determine the next contenders for the Tag Team Titles. Lazy ass art department.

FIONA METZ: I thought this match was gonna determine the next challengers for the Tag Titles?

DICK DELAURIER: The match narration just explained that.

FIONA METZ: Oh shit okay.

The hype is real, the bell sounds and Insane Fortune’s Aroa Ramma starts the match off against The Steel Rockers’ Colby Bruce. The two competitors tie up and Bruce sends Ramma into the ropes with authority! Ramma opts not to hit the ropes, he leaps onto the second for a springboard! Shinigami Foundation’s David Gibson blind tags Ramma and Ramma propels himself backward to catch Bruce with a TORNADO DDT!

DICK DELAURIER: What a move from Aroa Ramma! Insane Fortune are fresh off a victory over Strike 2 Kill. They are ready for their shot at Los Rebeldes.

FIONA METZ: I mean, they’ve gotta win first.

DICK DELAURIER: Obviously.

FIONA METZ: (mocking) Obviously.

Aroa Ramma tries to go for a cover but Vivian Rosser tells him that David Gibson made the tag! Gibson gets into the ring and grabs Ramma as the latter argues with Rosser. Before Ramma can react, he gets chucked across the ring with an overhead with a belly to belly suplex! Colby Bruce gets up to his feet and walks right into Gibson’s clutches. Bruce is sent sailing with a belly to belly suplex as well!

DICK DELAURIER: Colby Bruce was told by Jimmy Campbell that he needed to find his killer instinct.

FIONA METZ: He needs to find a softer place to land. Homeboy got CHUCKED.

In firm control of the contest, David Gibson tags in his partner Thomas Bane. Shinigami Foundation share a look and then hit Colby Bruce with a double dropkick that sends the upstart backwards into the corner where Jahkay “Kano” Miller stands. Kano tags himself in! Kano shoots into the ring with a springboard double axe handle but Gibson eats it and then hits him with an overhead belly to belly suplex! The man is a suplex machine tonight!

DICK DELAURIER: Another big suplex from David Gibson. Shinigami Foundation want to avenge that Semi-Final loss in the Riggs & Murtaugh Tag Team Classic.

FIONA METZ: But they lost so Fire Sale. Who aren’t even in this match…

DICK DELAURIER: They want to avenge the loss in general.

FIONA METZ: That’s stupid and dumb.

Steel Rockers’ Jimmy Campbell has grown tired of waiting. He joins the fray and hits both members of Shinigami Foundation with a double clothesline! Aroa Ramma rushes him and gets hit with a big boot! Steel Rockers stand Jahkay Miller up and hit him with a dropkick/lariat combination! Campbell tries to cover but he’s not the legal man! Campbell argues with Vivian Rosser but she’s not having it.

DICK DELAURIER: I really do feel for Vivian Rosser here tonight.

FIONA METZ: Ew, Dick.

DICK DELAURIER: I feel for her.

FIONA METZ: You need to feel like keeping it in your pants, my guy.

The legal man, Thomas Bane, grabs Jimmy Campbell from behind and plants him with a half nelson backbreaker! The crowd cringes at the impact! Campbell rolls out of the ring to the floor, holding his back in complete agony. During all of this, Aroa Ramma scaled the turnbuckles and was ready to fly. Ramma comes off the top rope with a moonsault onto Campbell on the outside! Both men are down and the crowd roars!

DICK DELAURIER: Aroa Ramma with another daredevil move! Insane Fortune are leaving it all out there tonight!

FIONA METZ: Who is gonna clean it up?

DICK DELAURIER: You’d think I’d be used to your unhinged comments by now.

FIONA METZ: So…not me.

Los Rebeldes are watching with vested interest. Mestizo is trying to get over the barricade at Jimmy Campbell and Aroa Ramma but Pedro Gonzales is holding him back. Everyone has cleared out of the ring save for Thomas Bane and Jahkay “Kano” Miller. Bane goes for a back suplex and then attempts to transition it into a backbreaker but Kano slips out and turns it into a cutter! The crowd pops BIG! Aroa Ramma is back up on the apron and Kano makes the tag to him.

DICK DELAURIER: Insane Fortune are ready to do some damage!

FIONA METZ: I just want to watch them kiss.

DICK DELAURIER: Of course you do.

Insane Fortune measure Thomas Bane and hit him with a sandwich enziguri! Bane is in a daze and he staggers back into a corner where Jimmy Campbell has taken up residence! Campbell tags himself in and enters the ring but gets hit with a double dropkick from Insane Fortune! Colby Bruce enters the ring to help his partner but he eats a double dropkick too! Colby Bruce rolls out of the ring and lands with a thud.

DICK DELAURIER: Colby Bruce can’t catch a break.

David Gibson blind tags Jimmy Campbell! Campbell is up to his feet and arguing that “They can’t keep doing that!” Campbell gets hit with stereo superkicks from Shinigami Foundation while arguing with Vivian Rosser. Aroa Ramma tries to get involved but he eats one too! He rolls out of the ring! Jahkay “Kano” Miller eats a third! Shinigami Foundation has cleaned house and are now alone in the ring with Kano. Kano is groggy and he slowly gets up. Shinigami Foundation snatch him up and plant him with Chasing the Demon (Magic Killer)! Gibson covers while Bane stands guard.

1..

2..

..3!

BIG MOUTH MINDY: Here are your winners and #1 Contenders to the Tag Team Championship, the team of Thomas Bane and David Gibson, The Shinigami Foundation!

"Whatever it Takes" by Hollywood Undead cues up and Shinigami Foundation leave the ring immediately after getting their hands raised. They walk over to where Los Rebeldes del Bien are seated and everyone starts talking trash. BRAVE Security gets involved and stops the situation from escalating.

FIONA METZ: Oh NOW they intervene?

DICK DELAURIER: They do what management tells them. That means The Consortium.

FIONA METZ: One show with these fucks and I already want to quit.

Mestizo tries to climb over the horde of security guards to get at Thomas Bane and David Gibson but is unsuccessful. Pedro Gonzales stands on his chair, holding up his Tag Team Championship belt as we cut to commercial.



Our next contest is set to begin but before that happens we take a look back to Superunknown and the dramatic return of the “Paladin Of Plainville” Sherman Dewey, who came out after Adam García had put down Ace Sky AND Masaru Shinja.

DICK DELAURIER: He’s calling for it! Could we finally see it?

The crowd goes absolutely crazy while Dewey charges up his palm. García is to his feet now, turns toward Dewey.

Dewey charges!

...

...

He loads back for the strike!

...

...

Adam García's eyes go wide and he immediately drops to his belly and rolls to the floor, sending Dewey charging right past him. García is safely on the floor. He backs away, passing by Dr. Costa and her team tending to Masaru Shinja and Ace Sky. The crowd is disappointed as García retreats, a look of horror on his face as he backs up the ramp.[/tt]

Instead of going to the ring we are backstage. “The Spanish Ace” Adam García is wheeling a stretcher through the disgusting hallways of the Bobby Shitake Arena. García did say that he wasn’t scared of Sherman Dewey but he isn’t looking too confident right now. García continues to wheel the stretcher down the hallway when the lights go out.

ADAM García: What the hell?

A blue orb appears in front of him. Adam García doesn’t know what to do. The orb starts to come towards him so he decides “fuck it” and charges with the stretcher towards the light, screaming a battle cry.

ADAM García: YAHHHHHHHH!

The Spanish Ace and the stretcher pass right through the orb and it dissipates. The lights come back on and it’s just Adam García and the stretcher. García looks around and then out of nowhere, Sherman Dewey tackles him onto the stretcher! It propels the stretcher through the curtain! The shot changes and we see their momentum take them out onto the stage and down the ramp, brawling the whole way!

DICK DELAURIER: So for anyone who doesn’t know how this works – the way you win this match is by incapacitating your opponent to the point where you can put them on the stretcher and wheel them up the ramp past the purple line.

FIONA METZ:: They already passed the purple line.

DICK DELAURIER: They need to do it coming up the ramp.

FIONA METZ:: Nonsense.

The stretcher slams into the ring apron and both men fall off to either side. Referee Wes Eastman calls for the bell and the stretcher match is officially underway. Both Adam García and Sherman Dewey stand up on either side of the stretcher. Dewey tries to reach over and grab García but García kicks the stretcher into him. Dewey is staggered and García jumps up onto the stretcher, kicks Dewey in the face and then leaps off of it and takes Dewey down with a blockbuster!

DICK DELAURIER: Adam García laying it all one the line!

FIONA METZ:: The purple line?

Sherman Dewey is rocked and Adam García has a look of pure menace in his eyes. García hauls Dewey up, applies a front face lock, and then drops Dewey with a brainbuster on the floor. Dewey is out of it and García picks him up and lays him on the stretcher. García starts wheeling Dewey up the ramp and the fans in Bobby Shitake are raining down boos but García doesn’t give a good shit.

FIONA METZ:: The hate for García is real. I hope to inspire that level of loathing someday.

DICK DELAURIER: I have zero doubt that you can achieve that.

FIONA METZ:: Aw thanks.

They are about halfway up the ramp when Sherman Dewey comes back to life and he kicks Adam García in the face! García stumbles backward and Dewey jumps off of the stretcher with a double axe handle but García leaps in the air and cracks him in the jaw with a leaping knee strike. Dewey is dazed and García lays him on the stretcher. García lays Dewey on the stretcher, hops up onto the guardrail, then leaps backwards with a moonsault onto Dewey, on the stretcher!

DICK DELAURIER: What a move from Adam García!

The stretcher is tipped over, both competitors are down. A “THIS IS AWE-SOME!” chant kicks up, which is gross. Adam García stumbles back up to his feet and rights the overturned stretcher. He lays Sherman Dewey on it and straps him in. A few moments later García has wheeled Dewey up the ramp, past the purple line. Wes Eastman calls for the bell!

BIG MOUTH MINDY: Here is your winner and Number One Contender to the GRBG Championship, “The Spanish Ace” Adam García!

Adam García has no time to celebrate because the RazorTron comes to life and the arena goes dark.

Ollie Maverick is dressed in a very nice suit as he enters the newest business to be promoted by the GRBG streaming platform. It’s certainly odd to have a man doing promotional work who refuses to let the public see his face but at the very least the well-behaved Raccoon makes for good pictures.

Ollie approaches the tour guide for ‘Marcus D. Sodd’s Museum of Torture’ and gives him a firm handshake.

OLLIE MAVERICK: Can I just say I am VERY excited about this.

TOUR GUIDE: Oh… you’re one of those…

The Tour Guide had given this tour to his fair share of S&M Kinksters and briefly his thoughts turn to the Creative Writing degree he has hung up on his wall at home.

OLLIE MAVERICK: One of those people with a thirst for knowledge? You bet I am! This is not a decision I take lightly and I appreciate your assistance with this tour, sir. Lead the way, sir!

We cut to Ollie looking at displays for both the Torture Rack and the Iron Maiden.

TOUR GUIDE: …falsely believed to be a medieval device, there is no evidence of the Iron Maiden existing before the 1800’s.

Ollie seems to be conversing with Rocket who has a little tuxedo t-shirt on so he also looks fancy.

OLLIE MAVERICK: Eh, I agree. Kinda cliched. Overused. Both of them actually.

TOUR GUIDE: I’m sorry, sir?

OLLIE MAVERICK: Hm? Nothing, Sommelier. You’re doing great.

TOUR GUIDE: Uh…thanks? Did you just call me a-

OLLIE MAVERICK: Hey, what’s this one!?

Ollie points to what appears to be a large humanoid figure.

TOUR GUIDE: Oh, this is the Iron Apega. King Nabis had this large metal humanoid built to resemble his wife Apega. When people would refuse to pay taxes he would force them to ‘hug his wife’ and this figure would basically crush them in it’s arms.

OLLIE MAVERICK: Man…as dope as a murderous hug robot sounds I think I need to see more before I make my final decision.

TOUR GUIDE: Decision?

OLLIE MAVERICK: What’s this one? This is… just a big metal bull. Do you get a big metal bull dropped on you?

Ollie is looking at a display of what is, in fact, a life-sized bronze bull with firewood underneath it as part of the display.

TOUR GUIDE: Ah… The Brazen Bull. Originating in Sicily, its victims were locked inside of this large animal and a fire was lit underneath to basically cook them alive. It was said that the acoustics of it made the victims' screams sound like a bull.

Ollie thinks a few things over and converses with Rocky a bit.

OLLIE MAVERICK: Alrighty…Sold!

The tour guide looks confused as Ollie reaches into his jacket pocket

TOUR GUIDE: Uhm…this….none of this is for sale. Is that what you thought this was?

OLLIE MAVERICK: I meant…sold as a concept. Not ACTUALLY sold. Who would actually think any of this was for sale? That would be…

Ollie accidentally drops his checkbook he was going for.

OLLIE MAVERICK: That uh…that was for the gift shop. I was gonna buy myself some thumbscrews to see if it helps keep me off twitter. Can I have the room for a moment? Gotta sell some wrestling tickets. Rocky go with this nice man to the gift shop and grab us a keychain for the collection.

Rocky ambles away and the Tour Guide follows after him, of course concerned about the live animal now loose in the building. Ollie turns to look directly at the camera.

OLLIE MAVERICK: Oh hi, Adam! Congrats on the big win bud! I was rooting for ya! In my position as GRBG Champion I work closely with our sponsors to come up with exciting ways to implement brand synergy. Business. Handshakefulness. Dynamics. Synergy. Core competencies. Merger…Other business words! What that means for me is that I have to get creative and come up with something to continue the tradition of the RAZOR Wrestling props department cursing my name as they have to build whatever dumb bullshit falls out of my mouth! Hey, speaking of which…inspired by our sponsors Marcus D. Sodd’s Museum of Torture I’ve COOKED up a little bit of an idea nd that’s no BULL. It’s a raccoon in fact! We’re gonna put a GRBG Spin on Sicilian History, Adam! You and I will be fighting to lock each other inside….the BRAZEN RACCOON!

Ollie steps aside. To show off the Brazen Bull… there is an awkward pause.

OLLIE MAVERICK: Which obviously isn’t ready yet because I just had the idea just… look just imagine this is a big bronze raccoon instead of a bull and uh… man did I mess up this reveal? Geez. Uh….yeah that’s the match. No bull! I already said that. Can we please cut no-



We’re back from our commercial break and Bobby Shitake Arena hums in anticipation for the main event. The lights dim every so slightly and then “Short Change Hero” by The Heavy kicks up. It’s not long until the new RAZOR Wrestling World Champion “Your Hero And Mine” Mark Storm steps out onto the stage, with Gregory Murphy on his heels.

Storm is still banged up from his Oblivion Cage Match two weeks ago but that doesn’t stop him from holding his championship up high for Las Vegas. The crowd pops BIG! Storm and Murphy make their way down to the ring and the champion is inside the ropes in short order.

BIG MOUTH MINDY: Laaas Vegaaaas! Please welcome your NEW RAZOR Wrestling World Champion, “Your Hero And Mine” Mark Storm!

Big reaction. Huge. Storm soaks it all in before receiving the microphone from Mindy. The music dies down but the love from the fans does not. A brief “You deserve it!” chant breaks out but Storm signals for them to stop all of that with a semi-embarrassed smile on his face.

MARK STORM: No, Las Vegas. YOU deserve it.

Another pop. So entitled, these fans.

MARK STORM: You deserve a champion that competes fairly and honestly. You deserve a champion that you can be proud of. PJ Lemon is one hell of a competitor but she constantly cuts corners to get the job done. That’s not me and it never will be. That’s why I asked Sophie Whimm to let me conduct this Open Challenge here tonight. The World Championship is not being held hostage ANY MORE!

The fans love it. The general vibe in the arena is that of hope. For the first time in the short history of the company the fans have a champion that isn’t a gigantic piece of shit. Looks good on us.

MARK STORM: I am going to be a fighting champion. I am going to give opportunities to those wrestlers who–

Suddenly, the distorted opening notes of “Never Fight a Man With a Perm” punch into the atmosphere in the Bobby Shitake Arena. The crowd pops for a moment in surprise before transitioning to boos as The McLean Avenue Mauler takes the stage, microphone in one hand, shillelagh in the other. He is still heavily bandaged up from his battle in Trash Land with Ollie Maverick yet The Bastard can’t keep himself from grinning.

BROGAN DUFFY: Look at you, Mr. Hero! Who would have thought a piece of shit from Brooklyn would come this far, huh? And now you’re out here like you’re the toughest son of a bitch in this company. Well news flash, jackass, you’re not shit compared to me!

The crowd rains down boos on Duffy as he walks down the ramp, eyes still locked on Storm.

BROGAN DUFFY: I’ve been doing my research, Mark. You've been all over the damn planet wrestling when you’re not here in Vegas and I’ll give you credit where credit is due, you’ve made a name for yourself. But you haven’t been in my boots-

Murphy gets in the ring and starts talking to Storm.

BROGAN DUFFY: OI! Murphy, from one Irish-American S.O.B. to another: shut your fucking mouth when I’m talking because I want your client here to hear every word! When the big one comes along, you haven’t got what it takes unless you have your little buddies backing you up; if it isn’t Murphy it’s your little crew of ‘heroes.’ And you want to call yourself MY Hero? My heroes are dead and buried and you couldn’t wrap their fucking knuckles because they could handle their business without any backup bitches to stand in front of them!

Brogan walks up the ringside steps and stands on the apron.

BROGAN DUFFY: I don’t need any little friends to do my work for me just like how RAZOR Wrestling doesn’t need a “Hero” like you. This ain’t a place for heroes– it’s a place for Bastards. Bastards like me who come along and- whether you love me or hate me you know this is true- knock the fuck out of people put before them. And yeah, I came up short in Trashland, but I’m not going to waste any time bitching and moaning over it. Especially not when you’ve laid out the opportunity for me to replace that GRBG Title with a new belt.

Brogan steps into the ring and gets in Storm’s face, centimeters away from being nose to nose.

BROGAN DUFFY: You’re going to regret making this open challenge, Mark. Because you’ve had your 15 minutes of glory, and I’m here to show you that your time is up.

Brogan throws down the microphone as a referee slides into the ring. The two opponents separate and start preparing for the match in opposite corners of the ring. Duffy stashes the shillelagh under the bottom turnbuckle.

DICK DELAURIER: Things are picking up here in Vegas for our main event, folks. You can bet there’s going to be some serious fireworks here tonight!

FIONA METZ: Well, the last time Duffy and fireworks were in the same space, shit didn’t go well for him.

Referee Diego Leach holds the World Championship up high in the air and we are set for our main event. Mark Storm bounces from one foot to the other, ready to get this match started. Brogan Duffy just glares across the ring at the champion. Duffy knows that this is the biggest match of his career. The bell sounds and the two men meet in the middle of the ring.

DICK DELAURIER: Here we are folks! It’s our main event for the RAZOR Wrestling World Championship.

FIONA METZ: I mean I respect the balls on Storm to defend the title so soon after the Oblivion Cage but like…incredibly stupid move.

DICK DELAURIER: You heard what he said. These fans deserve a fighting champion.

FIONA METZ: Well it might not be him after tonight.

There is a brief feeling out process that ends with a lockup between champion and challenger. The taller Mark Storm has the leverage advantage and he backs Brogan Duffy into a corner. Diego Leach steps in to separate them and Storm backs away, hands up. Duffy doesn’t go for the cheap shot, he opts to give Storm some space.

DICK DELAURIER: A rare show of sportsmanship from Brogan Duffy.

FIONA METZ: Maybe the trip to Trash Land changed him.

The two lock up again but this time Brogan Duffy forces Mark Storm down into a side headlock. Storm shoves Duffy off of him and into the ropes. Storm drops his head for a back body drop but Duffy kicks him in the face and drops the champion with a heavy lariat. Storm looks to rally back up but Duffy hits him with another.

DICK DELAURIER: Massive shots from Brogan Duffy.

The World Champion has not started off this contest on the right foot, Brogan Duffy is very motivated. Mark Storm gets up to his feet but Duffy surprises him with a running European uppercut! The champion is rocked! Duffy grabs Storm by the wrist and pulls him into an impressive exploder suplex! Duffy scrambles into a cover and Diego Leach counts.

DICK DELAURIER: This could be it!

1..

2..

KICKOUT!

FIONA METZ: Mark Storm is looking really slow tonight. He’s more injured than he’s letting on. I know liars and he’s lying.

DICK DELAURIER: About what?

FIONA METZ: About being able to fight! He didn’t think this Open Challenge thing through. Or maybe he thought some jabroni like Kid Kahuna would answer the call.

The champion is far from beaten. Brogan Duffy stands Mark Storm up and sends him into the ropes with an Irish whip (his specialty). On his return Storm slides through Duffy’s legs, narrowly avoiding another lariat. Storm pops up behind Duffy and nails him in the back of the head with a dropkick! Duffy stumbles forward and catches himself on the ropes. He turns to engage Storm but gets hit with a slingblade! Duffy is down, Storm stacks him up in a pin.

DICK DELAURIER: Storm looking to retain!

1..

2..

KICKOUT!

That last move took a lot out of the battered Mark Storm. Maybe an Open Challenge two weeks removed from the most brutal match this company has ever seen was not the move. Storm tries to stand Duffy up but Duffy surprises him with another European uppercut! Duffy back Storm into a corner and hits him with some heavy forearm shots! Duffy pulls Storm in and hits him with the Dolan-Plex (X-Plex)! Duffy falls into a cover.

FIONA METZ: Did you see how awkwardly Storm landed? He’s done, man. Game over. Game over!

1..

2..

KICKOUT!

Brogan Duffy is backed away as Diego Leach has become concerned with Mark Storm’s ability to continue. Duffy goes over to the corner where his shillelagh sits and glances over at the weapon. A figure hops the barricade and grabs it!

DICK DELAURIER: What is Jack McGrath doing here?

FIONA METZ: Looks like he’s stealing Duffy’s Irish beating stick before the Bastard can use it!

DICK DELAURIER: I don’t know that Duffy was going to use it. Why would he at this point in the match?

FIONA METZ: I dunno. The Irish aren’t known for their intelligence.

Jack McGrath and Brogan Duffy are having words, with Duffy screaming at McGrath to put the weapon back. McGrath refuses. Duffy reaches through the ropes and grabs it from McGrath! There is a tug of war but McGrath finally lets go of it. Duffy puts it back in the corner, turns around and walks right into the Super Slingshot Storm Strike (Buckshot Lariat) from Mark Storm! The fans explode as Storm covers the Bastard!

1..

2..

..3!

BIG MOUTH MINDY: Here is your winner, and STILL RAZOR Wrestling, World Champion, “Your Hero And Mine” Mark Storm!


Diego Leach presents Mark Storm with the championship. Las Vegas is cheering wildly. Jack McGrath enters the ring and is clapping for the champion. Storm and McGrath share a nod of respect but McGrath asks for the microphone from Big Mouth Mindy. The crowd quiets down to hear what McGrath has to say.

JACK MCGRATH: I know that isn’t how you wanted that to go down, Mark. But you and I are two of the only decent men in this company. I couldn’t stand idly by and let someone steal that championship from you.

Cheers from the crowd, despite some of them being unsure that Brogan Duffy was actually going to use the weapon. His whole time in the ring McGrath’s eye has not left the World Championship title.

JACK MCGRATH: I want to be clear in my intentions. I want that championship. I want to face you for it when you are good and ready. I know you just had a match only a few weeks removed from the Oblivion Cage so when you are healed up – I’m coming for you.

McGrath goes to leave the ring but Storm stops him. Storm hands the title to Diego Leach and can be heard saying “Ring the bell.” A sinister smirk appears on Jack McGrath’s face and he shrugs. Gregory Murphy tries to get Storm to reconsider but it’s already set. We are going to get a SECOND World Title Match tonight!

As soon as the bell rings Jack McGrath runs across the ring and hits Mark Storm with a big boot. Some audience members gasp because Storm ate all of it. Storm flies into the corner and hits the turnbuckles with incredible force. McGrath rushes in and starts hitting Storm with vicious rights and lefts to the body. Storm tries to cover up, leaving his face open. McGrath absolutely STARCHES Storm with a right hand and the champion drops.

DICK DELAURIER: We are seeing an incredibly violent side of Jack McGrath immediately here tonight.

FIONA METZ: You know that he cut off a dude’s fingers, right?

DICK DELAURIER: Yeah but Reid Ashford kind of deserved that.

FIONA METZ: Dick! I’m shocked!

Jack McGrath brings Storm out of the corner with a headlock and is relentlessly punching the champion in the face the whole time. McGrath breaks the hold, hits the ropes, and comes back with a MASSIVE roaring elbow. Storm is folded up like an accordion! The champion rolls backward and up to his knees only for McGrath to lift him up and plant him into the mat with a powerslam. McGrath covers!

1..

2..

KICKOUT!

Jack McGrath mounts Mark Storm and starts laying into him with more heavy shots. The champion’s eyes are glazing over but he is still able to block some of the strikes. McGrath is not blinking, his eyes are wide as he hammers the champion.

DICK DELAURIER: This is becoming difficult to watch.

FIONA METZ: Storm’s gotta make a move or Leach is gonna call this bitch. Maybe Murph can throw in the towel again.

DICK DELAURIER: That might be a good idea at this point…

On the outside, Brogan Duffy is up and he tries to get involved in the match but BRAVE Security gathers and stand in his way. They surround Duffy and escort him up the ramp, Duffy screaming expletives the whole time. Duffy looks ready to take on the whole security team but eventually he disappears behind the curtain.

DICK DELAURIER: I can’t believe I’m saying this but Brogan Duffy was cheated here tonight.

FIONA METZ: Shouldn’t have tried to use a weapon.

DICK DELAURIER: He really didn’t.

Jack McGrath still has Mark Storm down on the canvas and is hitting him with rights and lefts. Diego Leach is in close, ready to call this at any moment. Storm is really having trouble covering up. McGrath has grown impatient. He hauls Storm up to his feet and hits him with a crescent kick. Storm is sent back into the ropes but he returns with a slingblade! Las Vegas erupts with cheers!

DICK DELAURIER: Mark Storm is not dead yet!

FIONA METZ: Might have some brain damage though. Trust me, I know what it looks like. My dad for sure has CTE.

Jack McGrath scrambles back up but Mark Storm uses all of the gas left in his tank to charge across the ring. Storm leaves his feet and nails McGrath with a shotgun dropkick into the corner! McGrath crashes into the turnbuckles, staggers back out and tries for a desperation elbow but Storm moves and McGrath hits Diego Leach! The referee is down!

FIONA METZ: Holy shit! Diego Leach is dead!

DICK DELAURIER: He’s still breathing.

FIONA METZ: BUT FOR HOW LONG?

Jack McGrath can’t believe his bad luck. It gets even worse because Mark Storm grabs him from behind and quickly hits the Storm Strike (Rainmaker)! Las Vegas pops big again! Storm falls into a cover and Las Vegas makes the count but the referee doesn’t. Because he can’t! The crowds count stops and quickly changes to boos because someone has hopped the barricade!

DICK DELAURIER: Oh what the hell is he doing here? Where is security?

FIONA METZ: Handling Brogan Duffy. He looked ready to throw!

Reid Ashford appears with his heavily bandaged hand. He is wielding a metal pip and he slides into the ring. Ashford starts begging for Jack McGrath to get up. Mark Storm turns around and sees Ashford! The champion stands in front of McGrath! Storm is protecting his opponent! McGrath is up to a knee. McGrath locks eyes with Ashford and then BANG! Jack McGrath low blows Storm!

DICK DELAURIER: NO! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, MCGRATH?

FIONA METZ: Oh yeah. He’s fully corrupted now isn’t he?

Reid Ashford smashes the pipe over Mark Storm’s head and all Gregory Murphy can do is watch as Storm drops to the canvas, dead centre in the middle of the ring. Ashford slides out of the ring with the biggest smirk on his face. McGrath scrambles and stands Storm up. He hits Things Fall Apart (Vertical Drop Brainbuster). Ashford rouses Diego Leach from the outside just in time for Leach to see McGrath making the cover.

1..

DICK DELAURIER: NO!

2..

DICK DELAURIER: NOT LIKE THIS!

..3!

DICK DELAURIER: SON OF A BITCH!



BIG MOUTH MINDY: Here is your winner and NEW RAZOR Wrestling World Champion, Jack McGrath!

Diego Leach hands the championship to Jack McGrath and he almost can’t believe it. He falls to his knees, cradling the title. Reid Ashford enters the ring and helps McGrath to his feet with his good hand. Garbage starts flying into the ring. I’m talking…a lot of garbage. McGrath and Ashford don’t care. The two men stand with the arms raised as Episode #10 goes off the air.


• Kylie Ray def. Daisy Duke
• Mad Man Muto def. Pascal Gaudin
• Peregrina Loca & Araña Oscura def. Zilpah Okelo & Hijo de la Muerte
• Kash Warren def. Ace Sky
• Joey Bryant def. Murder Ninja
• Los Rebeldes del Bien def. Hope Freya & Ax Rockwell; Still Tag Team Champions
• Shinigami Foundation def. Insane Fortune, Steel Rockers; #1 Contender to the Tag Team Titles
• Adam García def. Sherman Dewey in a Stretcher Match; #1 Contender to the GRBG Title
• Mark Storm def. Brogan Duffy; Still World Champion
• Jack McGrath def. Mark Storm; New World Champion