Gold, The Metal of Dreamers and Schemers (Kash Warren)
Oct 7, 2023 20:54:55 GMT
Post by Kash Warren on Oct 7, 2023 20:54:55 GMT
*The scene opens up with highlights of Kash and Angela from their time in other promotions. The first highlight shows Kash locking in the Jersey Death Lock on a random luchador, the shot quickly shifts to Kash holding up a belt with a large “x” on it*
ANNOUNCER: Kash Warren has won the WiFC X-Treme Championship from El Tigre Mexicano! Kash Warren is the champ-champ!
*The next shot shows Kash delivering the Kash Flow to a smaller wrestler with long hair. The shot transitions quickly to another shot of Kash holding a championship.*
ANNOUNCER: Kash Warren has defeated Arturo Martinez to become the DHW Champ…this man officially has DHW on lock…
*The word “lock” echoes, fading slightly each time. The shot transitions to Kash standing in his “trophy room” The Jersey Jackass is surrounded by multiple championships from the various promotions. Kash stands in the middle of it all, his arm draped over Angela. Both are dressed in gaudy clothing. Kash with a terrible hawaiian shirt and white dress pants, Angela in a Jessica Rabbit-esque red dress*
KASH WARREN: Gold…the metal of dreamers and schemers…it has expanded countries, sank ships, sent men to their death…and made mortal men into legends…gold is a powerful thing, men like Muhammad Ali and Mike Tyson have been made into legends by the gold around their waists…and I intend to use the Vanguard Championship as MY stepping stone to legendary status because there seems to be this stigma…this preconceived notion that I am just some kid that’s out of my element…I’m just some punk that doesn’t deserve to be here…I have fought my way up from the age of 16 but I still need to “earn my stripes” and “pay my dues” the only dues I’m paying is my rent because I don’t need to pay all those old-heads in the locker room shit! The stigma of “paying your dues” is a bit like sucking your own dick…now let me explain before Molly cancels me. You see, Paying Your Dues, like sucking your own dick, is lauded as a way to achieve bliss…but it’s often underwhelming because at the end of the day, “Sucking your own dick doesn’t feel like getting your dick sucked…it feels like sucking dick,” and paying your dues, while important for those without TALENT, feels like a lot of rigamaroll to keep those with talent from a very young age down. It’s anticlimactic because all you’ve done is compete in frivolous matches and take unnecessary bumps to become a mid-card sensation…because WHILE YOU’RE TAKING BUMPS AND MAKING A NAME, THE LEGENDS ARE ABOVE FORTIFYING THE CEILING KEEPING YOU DOWN!
*Kash takes a moment to breath. He swallows back his anger, if only for a moment, and continues with the promo*
Now, I get it, I’m supposed to keep this quick to avoid RAZOR’s elegant fanbase from leaving their Hot Pockets for too long, but this idea that I need to work my way up and give respect to those who have been doing this longer than I have is stupid. I didn’t need to show respect to Ace Sky, I didn’t need to show respect to Arturo Martinez, Dominic Fazzoli, or Carson Gutierez, I needed to use them as a goddamn stepping stone to get to a place where I can battle people on my level…people like Joey Bryant…
Now, Joey, don’t get it twisted, I’ll still slap you so hard you’ll think you’re back at the stock exchange wondering why the dow is down 15% but I’ll do it with a tinge of respect. I respect Joey Bryant because I know how hard he’s had to work for an opportunity…I respect “The Martyr” but I don’t like the fact he consistently called me kid…I’m 21-motherfucking-years-old! I am an adult…and the fact that I have been called the “Prodigy” and touted as the next up-in-comer makes me sick to my stomach because I refuse to be the fucking future…I refuse to be “next-in-line” because in professional wrestling the line never moves forward…the line never allows for the man who’s “next” to become the man who’s “now” and that’s why I despise this nickname…I despise the stigma it holds, I despise the connotations that come along with it…I AM THE VANGUARD CHAMPION! There, I spoke it in existence because I know that everyone is going to stand there and say “You’ll be okay, you’re gonna be a star one day,” NAH, BUMP THAT! I’m a star RIGHT MOTHERFUCKING NOW! I am the biggest star in all of RAZOR and when I set foot in Mexico and face off with something VERY important to me on the line…I’ll fight for everything I have…I’ll fight for everything I DESERVE!
Gold may be the metal that launched a thousand ships but the gold on the Vanguard Championship…is about to be the foundation that cements KASH WARREN and the best wrestler in the goddamn world! All those Italian Jabronis, gone, Ace Sky, beaten…Joey Bryant…you’re next on the list, my guy, and that list is only made with one aspect in mind, to cross you out…and become the FIRST and ONLY Vanguard Champion!
Believe That…big man.
*Kash walks off screen and Angela smiles. She steps forward and starts talking.*
ANGELA DIAMANTE: Joey…honey, you’ve been around the block…and it shows, but there’s something about Kash that you cannot possibly handle. You’ve faced giants, determined rookies, old vets, and everything in between…but PASSION is a hell of a drug…and it’s pumping through the veins of Kashy…so while you may think you’re on your way to a championship…and you may think that Kash is out of his element…there will always be something in the way. In Mexico…you’re not just betting whatever you’re placing on the table…you’re betting your Martyrdom. So be prepared for that nickname to be the reason you pass. Prepare for the world to see you…broken.
*Angela smiles and waves with a silent “toodaloo” and walks off the screen as it fades to black*
ANNOUNCER: Kash Warren has won the WiFC X-Treme Championship from El Tigre Mexicano! Kash Warren is the champ-champ!
*The next shot shows Kash delivering the Kash Flow to a smaller wrestler with long hair. The shot transitions quickly to another shot of Kash holding a championship.*
ANNOUNCER: Kash Warren has defeated Arturo Martinez to become the DHW Champ…this man officially has DHW on lock…
*The word “lock” echoes, fading slightly each time. The shot transitions to Kash standing in his “trophy room” The Jersey Jackass is surrounded by multiple championships from the various promotions. Kash stands in the middle of it all, his arm draped over Angela. Both are dressed in gaudy clothing. Kash with a terrible hawaiian shirt and white dress pants, Angela in a Jessica Rabbit-esque red dress*
KASH WARREN: Gold…the metal of dreamers and schemers…it has expanded countries, sank ships, sent men to their death…and made mortal men into legends…gold is a powerful thing, men like Muhammad Ali and Mike Tyson have been made into legends by the gold around their waists…and I intend to use the Vanguard Championship as MY stepping stone to legendary status because there seems to be this stigma…this preconceived notion that I am just some kid that’s out of my element…I’m just some punk that doesn’t deserve to be here…I have fought my way up from the age of 16 but I still need to “earn my stripes” and “pay my dues” the only dues I’m paying is my rent because I don’t need to pay all those old-heads in the locker room shit! The stigma of “paying your dues” is a bit like sucking your own dick…now let me explain before Molly cancels me. You see, Paying Your Dues, like sucking your own dick, is lauded as a way to achieve bliss…but it’s often underwhelming because at the end of the day, “Sucking your own dick doesn’t feel like getting your dick sucked…it feels like sucking dick,” and paying your dues, while important for those without TALENT, feels like a lot of rigamaroll to keep those with talent from a very young age down. It’s anticlimactic because all you’ve done is compete in frivolous matches and take unnecessary bumps to become a mid-card sensation…because WHILE YOU’RE TAKING BUMPS AND MAKING A NAME, THE LEGENDS ARE ABOVE FORTIFYING THE CEILING KEEPING YOU DOWN!
*Kash takes a moment to breath. He swallows back his anger, if only for a moment, and continues with the promo*
Now, I get it, I’m supposed to keep this quick to avoid RAZOR’s elegant fanbase from leaving their Hot Pockets for too long, but this idea that I need to work my way up and give respect to those who have been doing this longer than I have is stupid. I didn’t need to show respect to Ace Sky, I didn’t need to show respect to Arturo Martinez, Dominic Fazzoli, or Carson Gutierez, I needed to use them as a goddamn stepping stone to get to a place where I can battle people on my level…people like Joey Bryant…
Now, Joey, don’t get it twisted, I’ll still slap you so hard you’ll think you’re back at the stock exchange wondering why the dow is down 15% but I’ll do it with a tinge of respect. I respect Joey Bryant because I know how hard he’s had to work for an opportunity…I respect “The Martyr” but I don’t like the fact he consistently called me kid…I’m 21-motherfucking-years-old! I am an adult…and the fact that I have been called the “Prodigy” and touted as the next up-in-comer makes me sick to my stomach because I refuse to be the fucking future…I refuse to be “next-in-line” because in professional wrestling the line never moves forward…the line never allows for the man who’s “next” to become the man who’s “now” and that’s why I despise this nickname…I despise the stigma it holds, I despise the connotations that come along with it…I AM THE VANGUARD CHAMPION! There, I spoke it in existence because I know that everyone is going to stand there and say “You’ll be okay, you’re gonna be a star one day,” NAH, BUMP THAT! I’m a star RIGHT MOTHERFUCKING NOW! I am the biggest star in all of RAZOR and when I set foot in Mexico and face off with something VERY important to me on the line…I’ll fight for everything I have…I’ll fight for everything I DESERVE!
Gold may be the metal that launched a thousand ships but the gold on the Vanguard Championship…is about to be the foundation that cements KASH WARREN and the best wrestler in the goddamn world! All those Italian Jabronis, gone, Ace Sky, beaten…Joey Bryant…you’re next on the list, my guy, and that list is only made with one aspect in mind, to cross you out…and become the FIRST and ONLY Vanguard Champion!
Believe That…big man.
*Kash walks off screen and Angela smiles. She steps forward and starts talking.*
ANGELA DIAMANTE: Joey…honey, you’ve been around the block…and it shows, but there’s something about Kash that you cannot possibly handle. You’ve faced giants, determined rookies, old vets, and everything in between…but PASSION is a hell of a drug…and it’s pumping through the veins of Kashy…so while you may think you’re on your way to a championship…and you may think that Kash is out of his element…there will always be something in the way. In Mexico…you’re not just betting whatever you’re placing on the table…you’re betting your Martyrdom. So be prepared for that nickname to be the reason you pass. Prepare for the world to see you…broken.
*Angela smiles and waves with a silent “toodaloo” and walks off the screen as it fades to black*